As I sit here taxiing into lima's airport, I find myself both pensive about and grateful for relationships. It's pretty clear that without them we would be nothing. From mothers to fathers, to brothers, sisters, friends, lovers and even perfect strangers, Each has their influence on our lives, from the profound to the fleeting, and yet, without these relationships we are isolated, alone, nothing. Yet, in truth, that isolation is never really even possible.
The ego believes in separation. It labels, categorizes and delineates: "this is this, and that is that," reducing things and experiences to words, concepts and ideas, when the reality is always so much more.... And when the ego gets involved in our relationships, it says, "I'm better than him," or "she is better than I," or "I don't like this about her," or "I wish he would just listen..." But all the while this mental chatter pulls us out of the relationship and into our own mental virtual-reality in which we do not experience life or our relationships as they are, but rather as we perceive them to be.
Quantum physics is a God's send as it shows us our true power to create: what we believe (or expect), we perceive. So what can this say about us and our relationships?
How do our perceptions of others (and our self) influence how we experience these relationships, and the world? The short answer is: powerfully.
Think of one of your favorite relationships. The flow of it, the mutual elevation, the reciprocal energy exchange, the love, all express the highest potential of relating. Yet as we encounter those 'undesired relationships,' we experience the exact opposite, feeling drained, full of disdain and dread.
Yet the potential is always the same: the ideal is always available, yet why at times does it seem remote, illogical, or down right impossible? You've guessed it; our perception. I've spent the past 12 hours flying through the skies and sharing stories with two separate and complete strangers, yet I find myself feeling perhaps more connected than I have ever, and it's thanks to the shift in my perspective and the resultant amazing connections it's allowed.
For so long I have looked at my relationships and been left wanting. And only today has it become absolutely crystal clear as to why. I was relating improperly. I, like most people, had it backwards, thinking that the relationships in my life owed me something somehow, and that people who didn't give it were selfish, which then allowed my ego's sense of self-importance and entitlement to run amok, blaming everyone and everything for its own shortcomings, judging each person for their perceived flaws, and by extension calling out more of that in them. Don't get me wrong, everyone has flaws, but that is exactly the point: If we all have flaws, who among us is fit to judge any of them?
I'm not suggesting we become spiritual ostriches and stick our heads in the proverbial sands when it comes to the challenging aspects of our relationships, what I am suggesting is a shift in our perception of the challenges and their origins. Would you scold a toddler for not knowing 1+1=2? Or yell at the elderly person for ascending stairs slowly? Then why judge people for their ignorance? We all have our challenges, our strengths and weaknesses, and the only way for us to fully master these challenges is through our acceptance and Love. Love, is indeed the answer. Love is what causes that elation in those "easy" relationships, but it also the remedy for those more unpleasant ones.
I know some are thinking right now... "Well, there are people that are just unlovable!" Those ornery, cantankerous and entitled individuals that drain the energy from a room the moment they walk into it can indeed be challenging for most of us to be around... But I promise you, speaking from experience, the moment you can remove the label and the judgement around this person, relieving the perception of separation, and generate a sense of love and acceptance for them, you will literally watch them transform before your eyes like magic.
When you can begin to understand, that God, The Universe, Love--Whatever you want to call it--is truly unconditional... Then you can begin to grasp this power. When you can fathom that "God" Loves even Hitler... You are advanced on this path...
Why is that? It is the power of Love. You could also call it unconditional acceptance, or patience, or kindness. Whatever the label, the experience is the same. You will definitely notice how this exercise will
Be easier to do with some than others, which begs the question, why? This is where the real challenge comes in: whenever we judge another, the truth is we unconsciously see that same flaw in ourselves but have yet to accept it, so instead of facing our inner demon, we find the easier outlet for release and project our own frustration on perceived "aggressors" when we are the one who havnt owned and accepted ourselves.
So the remedy? Love. Always and forever, love. And it starts at home with ourselves. Everyone has heard the old adage, but few fully understand its implications. When we love ourselves, we can love others, because we are all indeed, one in the same.
Unity>Separation.
Awareness>Ignorance
Love>Fear
To Our Highest Relating Potential!
No comments:
Post a Comment